Monday, November 8, 2010

Progression Lesson

I'm tired of false starts. I'm tired of living life through a bubble. I'm tired of regrets and broken promises to myself. I'm pieces of a puzzle, but the puzzle changes and I never seem to get it put together.  I don't find any of this to be particularly helpful in actually living my life. 

I've been thinking about joy, life, and the future.  What's important, what's not important, how I want to live my life. What matters, what doesn't matter, and not caring what people think about me.  These things have been rolling in my brain.  Now I need to bring them, these things, to life.  I need to manifest what it is that I want out of my life.  I need to cut loose the anchors that are no longer needed. There is life out there, and I'd like to join the party.

What is progress? For me, I think writing is progress.  I think making music and listening to music is progress. I think getting my dishes washed is progress.  I think not eating veggie sticks for dinner when I'm home alone is progress.  I think taking my meds, On Time, is progress. I think I've made some progress today.

I have to admit, while I don't really like change, I like progress. Progress is lovely.  Progress is healing and lessons learned.  I think I'm ready.

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